THOUGHTS FROM A FORMER PASTOR'S WIFE--PART FOUR

I am excited to post another installment of my "Thoughts From a Former Pastor's Wife," and show you some of the garden's latest glories! Above is a lavender liatris and below some peachy colored daylilies! I've been picking wild blackberries as big as your thumb, but I think today was the last picking!

THOUGHT NUMBER THREE--FITTING IN TO A NEW CHURCH

There is a strange phenomenon that occurs for a former pastor and his wife--fitting in to a new church. With us exiting the picture we hoped it would be possible for the new pastor to carry out his duties without former leadership clogging the way. There was simply no other way to handle this. That meant we needed to find another church, though we currently still live in the same community.

We did this in one simple stroke. We never visited anywhere else, we just knew where we should be. Our new church has been wonderful to us and we are "pastored" for the first time in a long time. We have completed some of the membership classes that they offer and are currently making our way through the various trainings they recommend.

However, there are drawbacks in moving from leadership to congregational member. I never realized how easy it was for me to attend church when I was paid to do it! I'm ashamed to admit it! I never could understand why everyone else wasn't there every time the doors were open like we were. Now that we have a different schedule and I work as well, I realize the difficulties families faced in making it to church functions. Plus, I always knew the schedule of EVERYTHING going on at church since Clint kept the calendar. I was used to just hopping in the car whenever it left the house and it was a given that I'd be in it and ready for church. Now we must make an effort to stay abreast of what's happening in our new church. It's a bigger church and in another town. All these factors make it challenging to attend every function.

I also think there was in my mind and heart a great desire to be accepted coupled with some trepidation about how another church would receive a former leader. I am not sure how much of my wonderings were fact-based or just imagination. We have been received warmly and embraced. But think about it, how many "FORMER" pastors and wives do you know?

If they came to your church, what would you do with them?

Are they valuable to you or a threat?

How does the leadership at your church view them?

Thoughts to consider. I think the American church needs to deal with these questions since church doors are closing at an alarming rate which in turn means pastors have the need to be absorbed into other churches at an alarming rate. Many couples each year become former pastors, thrust into secular employment and a new church due to various circumstances.

I hope you will consider the things I've said and think of former pastors you know. Maybe this little glimpse into our lives will help you relate to former pastoral couples should your paths cross! More in future posts.....Blessings, LORI

THOUGHTS FROM A FORMER PASTOR'S WIFE--PART THREE

THOUGHT NUMBER THREE--Results of leaving a pastorate

I, personally, have probably experienced the most identifiable challenges since we left the pastorate. I have been told that issues in the pastorate affect the pastor, doubly affect his wife, and triply (is that a word?) affect his children. I can attest to this very fact--I now believe it is true, for whatever reason—that’s just the way it works.

Things that have personally been a challenge to me mostly fall into two categories, the first being the realm of vision and ministry. I was heavily involved in the ministry alongside my husband though at times a casual onlooker would have had a hard time discerning what that role was and I had the freedom to step back if I got overly busy--so sometimes I did. I taught older level Sunday school classes, occasionally preached, and attended most leadership meetings along with elders and their wives. I took an active part in helping set vision and whatever else went on with leadership roles. This was a "behind the scenes" function that most of the church never saw. Being a creative, type-A personality, I think I was often a visionary and insrumental in helping with much of the direction and details we walked out together, while at the same time I was always trying to juggle my natural leadership traits so as to not overstep a biblical role. I had launched at least one major ministry while at the church that is still thriving six or so years later and many of the ideas we shared for the direction of the church we arrived at through discussions between the two of us at home or with the other couples in leadership meetings.


The results of this new post-pastorate role for me were at first a huge sense of euphoria that we could finally relax and leave behind the aspects of the position that were not working, for whatever reason--the job duties we did not seem suited for (everyone has special gifts but no one embodies all the gifts--only Jesus gets that distinction!). A definite sense of relief immediately flooded the household after the resignation and we found more peace than we had seen in years. Maybe this is because it was truly time for us to leave this position and so God's blessing naturally followed. Mabye it was the demands of the job that were suddenly removed. Maybe it was because the phone rang exponentially less than before, maybe it was the excitement of making a major life change. I do not know for sure, maybe all of the above.

I now find I miss being involved in ground-level planning--a definite function of leadership.


More on the second most challenging thing for me coming up in a future post--stay tuned!

Hope you enjoyed the pictures of the English Garden and my vegetable garden hollyhock, complete with a busy bee! Can you see the humidity "hanging in the air" in the garden picture? It's been very, very hot and humid here for a week. We are hoping for some relief. This morning we woke up to a thick fog over everything!

Blessings, LORI

THOUGHTS FROM A FORMER PASTOR'S WIFE--PART 2

THOUGHT NUMBER TWO--The Leap Of Faith

When we made the decision to leave our pastorate, we were sure that we had done the right thing. I still believe we did though there have been some challenging days since. But, for the most part, this move was a leap of faith that increased our faith and tremendous, unexpected blessings seemed to follow. We have had some of the greatest victories of our lives in the economic realm since resigning, while at the same time having some of the biggest uncertainties face us as far as earning money goes.

Even after seven months my little part time job is the ONLY income we can count on in a "natural" or "normal" sense--by that I mean that I usually know how often I will work. But all the jobs Clint does (he has at least four part time jobs) are "on call" type jobs. You never know when or IF you will be needed. He barely worked during the month of June and then had more income the first few days of July than all of June combined. There is absolutely no way to project our monthly income until the month is over!

Our already limited monthly income has been reduced by about half most months. We had been working under a sizeable pay cut for the 18 months previous to our resignation. We had offered to take the cut, so please don't think our church was purposely trying to limit our income! But that meant that most savings were already dwindling. Still, I have been amazed that Clint may work only a few days to my 12+ days per/month and he always brings in more money than me. I am very happy with my pay by the way--so that's not a concern! I believe the "anointing" for earning an income is on him as head of the family so that even in these circumstances, he never fails to provide. This fact alone increases my faith.

Some people would call us fools for taking such a risky step this late in our lives. as I've said before, I wouldn't recommend doing such a thing lightly. Our past experience walking through the Christian life helped us recognize the proper timing and how to trust for provision.


Stay tuned for my next post on "Thoughts From a Former Pastor's Wife."

Meanwhile, on other fronts....I'm moving forward on publication of "The Cry From a Distant Field." Hooray! Also we are experiencing a very serious heat wave here in Michigan. Thankfully, we have air conditioning in our house! Today I spoke at a tri-county ladies' prayer luncheon quite a distance from my home. The meeting went so well! Their usual meeting room is not air conditioned so we met in an adjoining room. It was pleasant, and the ladies were so sweet to turn out in such weather, but it did get a little warm before the event was over. We had a great time together and I continue to marvel at how the Lord seems to use stories from our lives in our evangelistic and church-encouraging efforts. Today my topic was about how God spoke to my heart while I was in Africa in 2004! There was a lot of interest in my books and I was thrilled for that!

Stay cool, and BLESSINGS, Lori

THOUGHTS FROM A FORMER PASTOR'S WIFE

I have been pondering my life over the last seven months--we resigned in January, 2011 from an 18 year pastorate of our home church (attended there 30 years). This was THE SINGLE MOST DIFFICULT DECISION we ever made, believe me.

So how is it going for us? Lots of people ask us that. For the most part, good, but there are definite challenges that result from this move as with any life-altering decision. I want to share them with you in an edifying way. I am hoping by writing these few posts that I will be able to share some wisdom and encouragement.

THOUGHT NUMBER ONE: THE PRE-SEASON

After many years in ministry gradually we found ourselves with a hungering or unsettled feeling that wouldn't go away. After much prayer and thought, oceans of tears, arguments amongst ourselves in the family (just being honest :), hugs and encouragement, family discussions, counsel, prophetic words, dreams, and circumstances, we made the decision to resign. Keep in mind that we had no other jobs to go to, no education (our original denomination did not require a degree), no prospects for future employment, and we were both almost 50 years old. We were going to be leaving a position that had been among the most rewarding as well as at times the most frustrating things we had ever done.

We raised our chidlren in this church, we buried two parents and other beloved friends from this pulpit, we led people to the Lord here, we cried tears with countless folks, we dedicated babies including our children and grandchilren, baptized believers, performed weddings, laughed, cried, and lived, declared the Word of God and sang His praises--all from this place. This was a BIG move, this was SCARY. Only a definite sense of God's leading was enough to move us out of this position. I wouldn't recommend it on any lighter direction. One of my favorite teachers speaks of a time in his life when he was in serious financial straits and says something like this, "It makes a great testimony if you live through it!" That's kind of how I feel about this transition.

So why am I now a FORMER pastor's wife? Well, my husband and myself are still ordained, but not currently "PASTORING" a congregation. He serves voluntarily as a hospital chaplain, retains his position as pastor to a couple of friends in their para-church ministry, continues to serve as the president of our county's jail chaplaincy board and preaches wherever and whenever asked.

Stay tuned for more on these thoughts.......Blessings, LORI

CUT AND DRIED--WILL YOU BE REMEMBERED?

As for man, his days are like grass; As a flower of the field, so he flourishes, For the wind passes over it, and it is gone, And its place remembers it no more. Psalm 103:15-16

The funeral director in my small hometown had three funerals today. One was of a beloved teacher of mine. This is somewhat unusual to have that many funerals in one day in town that size. My husband, Clint, will have worked at three funerals in a week's time by next Tuesday. I worked on filing and cataloguing countless obituaries at the library this week as well. It kind of made me think about our lives and how or if we will be remembered.

This evening I "cut" and "dried" two bunches of the flowers pictured here. One was the yellow yarrow, and the other, the very profuse baby's breath that you see being held up by the iron fireplace grate. It got very big this year and needed a prop! These flowers would quickly fade and be forgotten unless I took pains to preserve them. Our lives are similar. I surely wish some of my ancestors had left better information about their lives. I'd like to know more about them!

But as Christians, we must answer the question, "Will we be remembered?" If so, it should be for our Christlike lives and the people we led to the Lord. We might also be remembered through the children we brought up who carry on the faith after we are gone. It's humbling to think about after reading the above Psalm. It really doesn't take long for us to be forgotten unless we are diligent to leave something greater than ourselves behind. I am getting first hand experience with this as I work in the library's history room. So many people come to me to get information about a long-lost relative or a house they once lived in. I've been living in this vicinity for 50 years now and I realize that with the death of my Dad and Grandma (and each generation) lots of information about our friends and relatives was lost.

Make an effort to live in a way that will influence generations to come by leaving a legacy of Christian faith and leading many to the Lord. Great people of the faith can trace their spiritual ancestry-by that I mean those that led them to the Lord or influenced them. Be one of those influencers that takes many people to heaven with them--preserving a lasting memory that is worth more than gold. Blessings, LORI

BACK TO THE OLD WAYS

I decided to title this post, "Back to the Old Ways," in honor of not having a picture to post! I used to post long articles in the old days, with no pictures.

I've been so busy I haven't had time to do much but work. Last evening I picked a good bunch of wild black raspberries in the fencerows of our farm! I thank the Lord for those each year. They make the best jelly ever! It was peaceful out there and I got a good extended time of prayer in while I worked. However, the garb I had to don for that work is interesting indeed. Long pants, long shirt, bandana (I want to avoid ticks!), straw hat (same reason), bug spray, and boots. Why do the berries always ripen in the hottest part of the summer so you can be so comfortable in that get-up?

The brambles and bugs are both very thick. But last evening I had an easier time that usual. My hands were barely even stained and I came out of the patches relatively unscathed--until I turned across our field and headed toward the beautiful patches at the east side of our woods. The sun had already dipped behind the front of the trees and the mosquitoes literally chased me. I couldn't get back out into the field and into the sun fast enough. It was awful. We've had a lot of rain and I suppose that accounts for the onslaught!

Getting very close to the publication of my third book, "The Call From a Distant Field." I am excited, of course. I have a small amount of re-reading to do then it goes to the publisher who is currently working on the cover. I hope it is out by September. I will be speaking for a ladies' prayer group later this month and had originally hoped to have it by then--my own fault!

Will try to post pictures again soon. I have lots of projects going on. We are very busy right now and I've been putting in more hours at work. I love my job and so that's ok. I welcomed four new chickens to the farm last week and they are growing fast. Our barn sale was a huge success and we're glad to have everything cleaned out! Blessings, LORI

WHAT I LOVE ABOUT THE COUNTRY--PEARLS OF COUNTRY LIFE

My new chickens escaping the pen after I spent time trying to secure it this morning before work--DON'T LOVE THAT SO MUCH.....








Having to post a sign like this during our barn sale, because a good tractor is one of the most valuable things in the country......................












More yellow lilies--another variety bursting into bloom..........

We took a ride this evening to observe the gardens of our friends in the surrounding countryside and I got inspired for this blog post. Wish I had had my camera with me as I saw several pearls of country life along the back roads.......

Waving to a fellow farmer as he turned onto our road and the same country song was blaring from his truck as we had on in our car........

Crossing a dirt road bridge over a small creek where some girls had placed tiger lilies and butterfly weed in the handrails for decoraton......

Watching abundant wildlife and farm animals--deer, cranes, songbirds, calves, horses, kittens, dogs, and ducks...........

Passing no less than 4 different places where our ancestors owned fields and farms in the 1800's all within a few square miles.........

Coming home to my own comfortable farm!!!!!!!!!!!! I hope you will remember to thank God for a wonderful country to live in this Independence Day! Blessings, LORI